DAY 11: My Reactions To People Being Ungrateful

DAY 11: My Reactions To People Being Ungrateful

Christmas is the time where people start to buy everyone a gift. I've met support workers who like to give gifts to their clients for Christmas. It is a breach of the boundaries when we buy gifts for our clients. But, in saying that, these are people who we start to work with for years, get to know, assist/support when they're most vulnerable, put up with, know the ins and outs of their behaviours, know the triggers points and with a caring nature.. support workers are likely to give their clients a gift on Christmas. Adding to that, some people that support workers are to assist/support don't have any friends or family so they don't receive a gift from others. I spoke to my Coordinator about this very act and it seems that sometimes it's ok just not if it is all the time. So, I took it upon myself to buy my clients presents.

I bought a present that I thought would be best for my clients. Support workers work with the clients all of the time in a role of support workers so we gain more knowledge/information about what they like and what they don't like. I knew the perfect gift for one of my clients. I was excited to buy this gift for them. But, what I didn't take into consideration is jealousy of other clients I've worked with. I wasn't going to buy presents for those who are not my regular clients. So there was jealousy between two clients. I decided that I'd have to buy presents for both of them to keep the peace. One of them didn't like the present and showed that they dislike the presents. This person was unhappy, was very ungrateful about the presents, etc. When I had saw this behaviour, I did have a reaction in my solar plexus. The reactions were feeling like I didn't do a good job, feeling like I wasn't good enough, anger that this person would voice these words, slight shock and then a little sad for my other client for having this person in their lives and what they have to go through. None of my internal reactions reach the surface. I good at maintaining my posture, my body language, etc. This is just what goes on inside/internally as a reaction to my world/reality. I did learn a lot from this experience and I do realise that every challenge that comes my way, such as this, is a great opportunity to really test myself..... What will I do next, what will happen and in this situation physically what has to be done is managing to keep oneself from being brought down or argue with the person. Just swipe it away as it does not reveal who we are as a person it shows everyone who they're as a person and what lurks inside of them. But to also look at the entirety of why someone is like that to be able to understand why they're like that and as a support worker, ''what can I do to assist/support them to better their lives''.  I realise that all situations that present themselves in my world/reality are a way to test if I am going to handle the situation in the best interest of all or not.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel hurt by a client displaying ungratefulness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel like I haven't done a good job with selecting present because of someone else's decision to behaviour in ungrateful ways.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame me for someone else's choice to react the way they did about receive a gift that they did not like.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel sad about what my regular client has to put up with

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that every challenging situation is a way to test if I will do what is best for all or not.


When and as I see myself feeling hurt, angered, or unhappy about the way someone reacts to a gift I've given them - I stop and I breathe - I realise that a person who chooses to through a tantrum about a gift that I've given them has nothing to do with me, but everything to do with them, I just have to maintain doing what is best for all in those moments to ensure further damage is not done to myself or others.