DAY 13: Making Promises I Don't Have The Time Or Resources To Keep

DAY 13: Making Promises I Don't Have The Time Or Resources To Keep

Over Christmas I made a promise to Person A. It was to download songs of her favourite singers onto a USB stick. It was not a difficult task to do and I knew it would mean a great deal to Person A. What I seem to forget about when I make these types of promises is the little time that I have to invest in completing these tasks. The task is simple, but when one has priorities that come first, little tasks like these are put on hold. When the task is put on hold Person A has to wait. Some people in life do not have a lot to look forward to, so having to wait for something can really make them impatient because it can be the highlight of their week or day to have what they were promised. It can be manifested by consistent asking and consistent reminders. I know I have to work with Person A so I have to go out of my way to get it done. It is a mountain to climb in itself because my computer has stopped working recently and due to not having a car I'd have to use my own money to have transport to go to a place where there is a computer and in all of that I have to manage my other work related tasks. Having now climbed the mountain to keep a promise I made I realised it is best to not make promises without first considering if I have the time, resources, money, etc. It is best to do that so that I am not creating a situation that can effect rapport building, my financial situations, my time management and my job. So, being considerate of self and others before making promises. How that can be done is saying ''I'll check to see if I have the time and resources to do it''.. Instead of saying ''Yep, I can do that for you... not a problem''.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make promises that I do not have the time and resources to keep.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make promises to Person A and other people without checking in with my own schedule and resources first hand.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel angry at Person A for consistently reminding me about my promise.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget reality when I say I can do something for someone else.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that I come first.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want/desire to do everything for everyone one else instead of considering what I need to do for me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make promises that I cannot keep

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to want/desire to say ''Yep I can do that'', to please the people I work with and make them happy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be too giving of the time and resources

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel depressed about having to follow through with promises and losing money when I am suppose to be gaining.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel depressed about not being able to keep promises.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that it is selfish to be less giving and more considerate of my time and resources.

I commit myself to say that I'll have to check my schedule and the resources I have before saying I'll do this or I'll do that for them.

I commit myself to not make promises that I cannot keep or follow through with.

DAY 12: Jealousy Of The Favourites

DAY 12: Jealousy Of The Favourites

A support worker can assist/support in the choice/decision of how the day will go. We can come up with ideas for the client to consider how they will spend the day. It is usually in the best interest of the client and the support worker. It could be spending the day grocery shopping, participating in arts & craft, watching movies or TV, listening to music, cooking, etc. As a support worker out on the field working with the client, we have a bit more control over how the day will go, but the client has the final say. In each of the ideas made, how the client will behave, speak, and make choices does depend on a variety of factors.

One factor is who the support worker is. Some support workers have worked with a client for years. They have built a great rapport, gained their trust, know the ins and outs of their behaviour and therefore, have a great deal of influence on the client. I've mainly seen support workers use this influence for the benefit of the client. I see the great difference between who the client is with me in comparison to how the client is to/towards a very experienced support worker who has a great rapport with the client. I sometimes experience some jealousy come up to not being one of the favourites of my clients. What type of thoughts stem from jealousy ''what ways can I start being my clients favourite?'', ''How can I upstage the favourite support workers?'' and then it turns into a want/desire to please my client. Wanting/desiring to please and not make sure that it is assistive/supportive both is a sure way to lose respect for oneself and lose respect from the client as they will know that you're just out to please them. They will like you more, but in saying that, they will want you to please them more and if they're not pleased with you, then it will lead to reactions from the client that can consist of anger, annoyance, frustration, etc. because you're not pleasing them.

A support worker's job isn't to please the client. The job is to do what is best for all. This includes self and the client. Wanting/desiring to be a favourite is turning a non-competitive job into one of competition, jealousy, etc. Each support worker works differently with their clients. This is beneficial for the client because they get a variety of difference throughout the week. If all the support workers were the same and worked the same to the Tee, then the client would get no variety, no stimulation, no challenges, no ways of working with different support workers. We cannot always work to the Tee, all support workers are different in how we work to build our rapports with clients. This is a cool factor and really assists/supports the client. It's not about messing up their routines, it's about keeping their routines, but adding the difference of who we are to them in the best interests of our clients. There need not be any competition, or jealousy. What matters is what is best for all in the time we have with out clients because the end result is to make sure that our clients are well-looked after and have achieved the goals they've set for themselves on that very day. What we want to add of ourselves in that time depends on what we decide as support workers.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want/desire to be my client's favourite support worker

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that the main goal on every shift is to assist and support my client to the best of my abilities in a way that is beneficial for my client and I.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want/desire to please my client to be a favourite.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want/desire to complete with my colleages to be the client's favourite support worker.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be jealous of support workers who have built that trust and good rapport to have a great influence on the client.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to expect my clients to open up to and give me all their trust right away when that type of trust is developed over time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to expect client's to be exactly the same as who they're with other support workers when every relationship that a client has with support workers will be different

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that the difference for the clients is a cool factor because they get a variety and stimulation from the difference.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe a support worker's job is to be a favourite of the clients. 

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that as long as the job of caring, being considerate, conversing with client, tending to their needs and assisting/supporting them where near necessary then that is a job well done.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to expect myself to do more than what needs to be done.

When and as I see myself being jealous about the rapport that my colleagues have with clients - I stop and I breathe - I realise that the difference that we support workers provide is beneficial for the clients because it helps with variety and stimulation.

When and as I see myself making my job about competition - I stop and I breathe - i realise that assisting/supporting someone to live a fulfilling life a duel effort by all support workers working with that individual client. Therefore, no compeition can exist when assisting/supporting someone to live a fulfilling life as we all need each other to converse, provide feedback and create a great rapport.

DAY 11: My Reactions To People Being Ungrateful

DAY 11: My Reactions To People Being Ungrateful

Christmas is the time where people start to buy everyone a gift. I've met support workers who like to give gifts to their clients for Christmas. It is a breach of the boundaries when we buy gifts for our clients. But, in saying that, these are people who we start to work with for years, get to know, assist/support when they're most vulnerable, put up with, know the ins and outs of their behaviours, know the triggers points and with a caring nature.. support workers are likely to give their clients a gift on Christmas. Adding to that, some people that support workers are to assist/support don't have any friends or family so they don't receive a gift from others. I spoke to my Coordinator about this very act and it seems that sometimes it's ok just not if it is all the time. So, I took it upon myself to buy my clients presents.

I bought a present that I thought would be best for my clients. Support workers work with the clients all of the time in a role of support workers so we gain more knowledge/information about what they like and what they don't like. I knew the perfect gift for one of my clients. I was excited to buy this gift for them. But, what I didn't take into consideration is jealousy of other clients I've worked with. I wasn't going to buy presents for those who are not my regular clients. So there was jealousy between two clients. I decided that I'd have to buy presents for both of them to keep the peace. One of them didn't like the present and showed that they dislike the presents. This person was unhappy, was very ungrateful about the presents, etc. When I had saw this behaviour, I did have a reaction in my solar plexus. The reactions were feeling like I didn't do a good job, feeling like I wasn't good enough, anger that this person would voice these words, slight shock and then a little sad for my other client for having this person in their lives and what they have to go through. None of my internal reactions reach the surface. I good at maintaining my posture, my body language, etc. This is just what goes on inside/internally as a reaction to my world/reality. I did learn a lot from this experience and I do realise that every challenge that comes my way, such as this, is a great opportunity to really test myself..... What will I do next, what will happen and in this situation physically what has to be done is managing to keep oneself from being brought down or argue with the person. Just swipe it away as it does not reveal who we are as a person it shows everyone who they're as a person and what lurks inside of them. But to also look at the entirety of why someone is like that to be able to understand why they're like that and as a support worker, ''what can I do to assist/support them to better their lives''.  I realise that all situations that present themselves in my world/reality are a way to test if I am going to handle the situation in the best interest of all or not.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel hurt by a client displaying ungratefulness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel like I haven't done a good job with selecting present because of someone else's decision to behaviour in ungrateful ways.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame me for someone else's choice to react the way they did about receive a gift that they did not like.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel sad about what my regular client has to put up with

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that every challenging situation is a way to test if I will do what is best for all or not.


When and as I see myself feeling hurt, angered, or unhappy about the way someone reacts to a gift I've given them - I stop and I breathe - I realise that a person who chooses to through a tantrum about a gift that I've given them has nothing to do with me, but everything to do with them, I just have to maintain doing what is best for all in those moments to ensure further damage is not done to myself or others.

DAY 10: Less Work, More Time For Goals

DAY 10: Less Work, More Time For Goals

I've worked non-stop since I started working as a support worker. It is one of those jobs that require people for any type of hours if they needed to be filled. The problem with my job at the moment is that I work very long hours. I finish a 7 am - 7 am shift, cross over to a shift at  8 am - 10 am, I have a 2 hour break then start a new shift at 12 p.m. - 5 p.m. or I finish a 7 am - 7 am and cross over to a  8 a.m - 7 p.m. shift. These hours that I work take away my social time, my time that I should be focusing on goals, my relationships are affected, I don't get to do the things I like to do and the money for the work & the extra stuff I do on shift doesn't seem to be covering or adding up to what I know my work and assistance/support should be priced. I do know at the end of the day I am assisting/supporting someone, but it is at the expense of assisting/supporting myself. This is a very unhealthy way to live life. I've considered cutting down to less hours, but what stops me is the nature that this company is built on and fears of losing my job.  The people that run the show are spiteful and can be nasty. I've heard lots of stories about the company and do not want some experiences to happen to me. For example, asking for less hours then being taken down to one shift a week even if I have asked for 3. But, if that were to happen I'll just have to start rearranging my life. What is cool is that in challenging times we can change, redirect, move ourselves, investigate, come up with plans and find other opportunities that we can create for ourselves. In the challenging times {that I've had a lot} I find that I will always find a way, a new way, get back up, do what I need to do and continue to create a life that I want... where I am comfortable. Sometimes we will come to realise that some directions are not beneficial for us and we will have to go down a different one. It's all part of life. But if we fear stepping out, going a different direction, fear of instability, fear of the unknown, fear of what may come up as reactions, fear of failure, fear of mistakes, fear, fear, fear... if we fear not going a different direction, trying it out, spending the money needed.. then how are we suppose to reach that position we want for ourselves. It's not going to come if we don't make changes, if we don't step out, if we don't go a different direction. It's necessary at times to do that which puts us deeply out of our comfortzones to get to where we want to go in life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear leaving my job to start my business

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear leaving the community care industry to focus on what I'd like to give to the world and myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear asking for fewer hours so that I can focus on my social life, goals, things that I like to do and slow but surely, leave the industry.

i forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear starting up a business that may not succeed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not succeeding

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that challenging times can bring the best out of ourselves.

i forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that putting the work into a business, the willingness to create it, the time spent in it, the progression and development will determine the success of it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear letting go of my job.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to work extremely long hours where I do not have time for anything else but work.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that it is unhealthy to work extremely long hours

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that I can down my hours to be able to have a healthy balance of work and personal life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the nature that this company is built on.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the experiences that I"ve hear from colleagues happening to me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear failure from the businesses that I create for me and other people.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that I only have one life and I can either spend it working for another person for money that I do not see assists/supports me or compliments the extras that I do in my job or I can create what I can mold, adapt, perfect and give to others.

I commit myself to ask for less hours

I commit myself to cut down the hours I work.

I commit myself to start investing time into my business regardless of if I do not earn money when I start up.

I commit myself to jump into these areas and test myself to see how I go

I commit myself to create a balance of work and personal life.

DAY 9: It Requires Discipline and Consistency

DAY 9: It Requires Discipline and Consistency

I am coming into my fifth month of working as a support worker for people with a disability and mental health condition. In my 5 months, I've learned how challenging this industry is. I was thrown into the deep end when I first entered this line of work. I studied for 5 months and none of the textbooks I read prepared me for the real world. What I have learned in this line of work I probably would not learn anywhere else. I've enjoyed the challenges that I have faced. Some of these challenges have been confronting and have lifted the rug right from under my feet, lol. But in saying that, I've had good times in my job too. I seem to emphasise on the bads because the bad experiences tend to stand out the most. Those experiences have sent shockwaves, but I do understand that it is the way I react to them. Not that I am blaming myself here, but I can tell at times that if I am non-reactive, skilled in the areas I need to be, then this job isn't so bad. The bads are no longer the bads if I know how to direct the situations and what comes up within me as the reactions I have to the problem, event/situations. It makes life as a support worker easier if one is non-reactive, levels up in particular skills and remains on the toes. Because the clients will keep a support worker on their toes no matter what. I've learned to not let my guard down in this line of work. Some clients I am able to let my guards down slightly, but not all the way. In this line of work, it is best to trust one's own 'knowing of how to work with clients' and have fun along the way. It say this work is unlike any other. It's a world of its own like all others. In this job you put your entire self into it because of the amount of skills it requires and the focus it requires. A support worker has to clean, cook, observe, recognise, monitor the client for medical professionals, watch to see if clients go to the toilet {depending on condition of client}, has to know how to block punches, know the clients movements {depending on the client} and much, much more. A support worker's job is a serious one and a fun one at the same time. The challenges make it fun.. it's just all about the skills and the way one works with the clients. It's a bit like a chess game at times. It's very mental in the stages of building a good rapport, a game of 'how to keep yourself safe, but how to assert yourself, it's a very interest job and it isn't for the faint-hearted. It is definitely for those who want a challenge.

This job has helped me identify points about me that needs changing. Although I enjoy the challenge, I do find myself reacting to each challenge that comes up in my job. I do breathe away the reactions and place some forgiveness, but I am still not as disciplined or good with the tools as I'd like to be. I am learning as I go in life and it does take a great deal of persistence and consistency with the breath and letting go. One that I would need to master to be the best I can be.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be not be disciplined with the tools when I am working.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that I can be/become disciplined with the tools.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to lack confidence in me being/becoming disciplined with the desteni tools each time that I fall and forget to apply.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be very hard on myself for forgetting and falling

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that I would not fall or forget if I were to consistently apply the tools real time.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand the importance of the desteni tools.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear becoming more disciplined and consistent with tools

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as weird if I choose to be disciplined and consistent with the tools and using my structure for assistance/support.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have not used the tools effectively

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that the tools do come first in my life because they assist/support me in every way.


I commit myself to be/become more disciplined and consistent with Desteni tools.

I commit myself to use the tools at work.

I commit myself to use my structure to help me to be disciplined and consistent.

DAY 8: Fear And Guilt About Letting The Office Know

DAY 8: Fear And Guilt About Letting The Office Know

I work with people that may have a criminal history. They could be reoffenders on probation, have orders out on them for domestic violence, animal cruelty orders and/or assault charges.. just to name a few. The work that I do requires me to inform the office if any of these orders have been breached. Some clients may plead with the support worker to not tell, show that they don't care about the consequences, see the support worker as snitch for doing their job and this creates some tension in the rapport between client and worker. I've had an experience like this recently. I ended feeling a little bad and fearful about how my shifts will go after letting the necessary people know about a breach.

What I am afraid of is the individual verbally abusing me if people contact regarding the breach.

I fear the individual calling me names and the rapport not being a good one that assists/supports both.

But it is part of my job to do what I've got to do to ensure the safety of myself, the client and others. If I was to not inform the necessary people it would b my responsibility if they found out the next day and I hadn't informed anyone of the breach. I could lose my job and the individual could lose everything they've got. So it's always the right move to make to ensure everyone's safety. If the client blows off steam, verbally abuses, attacks or anything like that, I can get my things and go. That's all it takes and I can make that clear.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear letting the necessary people know that a breach has occurred.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear damage to the rapport with clients for ensuring everyone's safety

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my client not liking me and our shifts being ones filled with no communication or fun.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what Person A will do if they found out I was the one who let the necessary people know.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear Person A verbally abusing me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear Person A attacking me if they were to find out

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that if Person A doesn't get why I did and then becomes abusive in any sort of way, I can  walk straight out and go home.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand it's ok to tell the necessary people if a breach has been made.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear doing what is necessary for the safety of others, myself and animals.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what will happened on my next shift with Person A

When and as I see myself afraid to tell the necessary persons if a breach has been made that puts everyone at risk - I stop and I breathe - I realise that the sacrifice of a good rapport with Person A is necessary if all are at risk.

I commit myself to walk straight out of Person A becomes abuses in any sort of way.

I commit myself to make sure that I inform the necessary persons about a breach at work

DAY 6: Your Safety, Health and Well-being Matters

DAY 6: Your Safety, Health and Well-being Matters

In the community care industry support workers may experience hard to work with clients. A hard-to-work with client may be one that can become violent or abusive. They might bite, scratch, verbally abuse, hit, push, punch and/or kick support staff. In these cases, it's best to know your own limits. If it is repeated behaviour and it's not changing then know that it's ok to let go of the client if it is impacting on your well being and safety. A support worker doesn't have to put up with verbal or physical abuse. This is something that I am learning from my own experiences.

So far in my original as a support worker I've had some pretty hectic events/situations occur. These situations were different, but we're all challenging to say the least. I've been verbally abused, hit in the neck, had a client dig their nails into my arm, scratched, pulled to the floor and bit (luckily they didn't have teeth). All of which can be quite a draining process for all involved. So, in any case.. I realise if abusive Behaviours continue and the individual does not change then it is best to let go of that person as it could be damaging to ones own well being, health and safety.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel like I have to stay with abusive clients

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that if a client's behaviour is continuously destructive then I have a right to take actions to prevent my well being, health and safety from being harmed by the client.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel like a failure in my job if I let go of clients who don't seem to be improving or changing their behaviour

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am a failure if I give up on certain clients who show a continuous pattern of being violent

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that I have to make sure that my health, safety and well-being is ok when I work with clients

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what my colleagues will say about me if I were to let go of specific clients who are aggressive, verbally abusive and violent.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that if I do not ensure that my well being, safety and health is ok when working with a client then I'd be putting myself in dangerous situation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear losing my job if I turn down clients that have patterns of violence towards me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear losing a bit of my income for turning down clients who are violent.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I just have to such it up and hope for the best when working with client who have a pattern of violence and emotional outbursts.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear people saying that I cannot handle it and thinking that I am not cut out for this industry.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that choosing to not work with someone who has a pattern of violence towards me is a choice that takes consideration of my health, well being and safety.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that if violent behaviours do not stop, change or brought to a solution then it is best to let go of the client.

I commit myself to turn down/let go of clients if they have a continuous violent pattern of behaviour

DAY 5: Guilty Joy Ride

DAY 5: Guilty Joy Ride

I don't have a car or a license to use for transport. I use Ubers to move from one place to the other. It is the same for when I am working with a client and I am required to take them places. I use Ubers. My work does not pay for the Ubers, I have to pay with my own money. In this line of work I can understand why they make it a job requirement for people to have their license and a car. Public transport is to expensive and time consuming. It is not good for the client because if they have a mental illness for example they can become very easily reactive to things taking too long and having to wait or public transport taking half of their personal spending money. Even know it states in the agreement that people are required to take people in public transportation, it is just easier to have ones own car as well licence. Sometimes I'll be short of money and won't be able to take the client for a drive. In these situations I feel very guilty. 

Feeling guilty about it doesn't make the situation any better. I'll place emphasis on the point of not having car. React to it, and then make myself feel small or less competent in my job. For someone who doesn't have a car and has done twice as much work then other support worker's, I'm doing very well. I've come into the job and thrown into the deep end and in this type of work, you either sink or swim. Lol. I have enjoyed the Uber rides. The long talk with individuals and the laughs I've had. Getting into their fancy leased or owned cars, hearing the individuals I work with experience themselves in flashy cars, hearing them talk to the Uber drivers, and I've enjoyed the generosity of other staff members. Not having a car or license at the moment and making do with public transport has taught me a lot about people. I won't always be driving in fancy cars and money to move from house to house. It's too long till I have enough for license and car. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel incompetent without my license and a car of my own.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel guilty about not having my own car to drive my clients around 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel annoyed about not having a car to put all the tools I want to use for work in.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel inferior and less than in comparison to the rest of the support workers who do have cars

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel guilty for not having the money to Uber my clients around at times.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel guilty about having to use public transport to assist/support my clients around the community

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel frustrated and annoyed about the money that I use to get to my client house

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that I won't have to use money for public transport for too long.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that it hasn't been that bad catching Ubers as I make it out to be.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel annoyed about the money I have to spend to do my work when I want to making money and not having to spend too much.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that I've been doing good despite not having a car or licence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to complain about having to catch Ubers for work

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my clients getting impatient with public transportation and Ubers to the point where they want to lash out verbally or physically.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what could possibly come out of my clients when they're in a reactive or emotional state

When and as I see myself complaining about making use of public transport and Ubers - I stop and I breathe - I realise that working this way won't be forever, it is only temporary as I am saving for a car.

When and as I see myself feeling guilty for not having car to take clients places - I stop and I breathe - I realise that I can catch public transport and Ubers to assist/support my clients and/or ask another support worker to transport us.

DAY 4: Why Do I Have To Clean

Support Worker's Journey To Life

DAY 4: Why Do I Have To Clean

One of the jobs as a support worker is to help clean the client's home. The amount of cleaning we do depends on the clients capabilities. If they're unable to move themselves like able-bodied people are, then the support worker does all the cleaning for the client. What had come up within me yesterday to cleaning someone's house was the want to not have to clean. It came up as back chat in the process of sweeping kitchen floors of a house that seemed to have been neglected for awhile.

The back chat more specifically was "why do I have to do this" and "it's just going to be a mess again" along with a want, a pull to go interact with my client and sit down. Support workers have a set amount of hours in the client's homes. In that time we are required to use some of those hours to clean.

I did question "if we do not clean then who will?" and it does assist/support the client when they live in a neat &a tidy clean home. It helps everyone to be organised and less cluttered. Things are in their rightful places, everyone is on board with where everything is and the client is less reactive when the mess is out of the way. It helps a great deal. We all like a clean home and to look at it this way, most of my clients didn't ask to be the way they are. If the high needs clients had a choice, I'm sure they would want to clean for themselves. But because of their condition, they cannot.

So I realise that being a support work is about doing the best we can to help improve our clients wellbeing and help those who cannot help themselves as much as they'd like too.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to backchat about having to clean a house the had mould, vomit, and other bodily fluids.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to backchat about cleaning cigarette ash

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be frustrated with other support staff for not doing a good clean job on their shift and then want to leave the state of the house the way it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want/desire to neglect my client because other support staff may have done so by not cleaning the mould, floors, and other rooms of the house

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel annoyed about having to clean a house that is likely to be messy again the next time I am there

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be annoyed about not having my own cleaning tools that I can bring to my clients homes when they're lacking tools

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel embarrassed about cleaning up vomit and other stuff that people don't want see or have a heavy reaction to/towards

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel pissed off about individuals who do not have the capabilities to look after themselves being cheated by composers and this system at large.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel pissed off about unhealthy products being sold in our system and it being consumed by clients whom I have to clean up and look after.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel hopeless as a support worker to assist/support my clients to live healthier and fulfilling lives in a system that is taking advantage of vulnerable individuals

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel hopeless in a system that doesn't really give a damn about our most vulnerable but would simply prefer to keep them at bay

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel pissed off about the most vulnerable individuals being taking advantage of by the medical fields and pharmaceutical companies.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that Australia's systems truly care for our most vulnerable.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel annoyed and crappy about having to take care of people who are the most vulnerable in a system that seems impossible to change.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that it is possible to change this world where all individuals lead fulfilling lives.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that I can assist/support my clients to lead fulfilling lives by planning out the days that they will enjoy after all the work is done in the house

When and as I see myself not wanting to clean and composing about cleaning for higher needs clients - I stop and I breathe - I realise that my client cannot clean for themselves because of their condition and I as an able-bodied person can make a difference in this persons life by making sure that household cleaning is done.

When and as I see myself feeling hopeless to assist/support my clients to live fulfilling lives in the current world system - I stop and I breathe - I realise that it is possible to make changes even on the minute levels in my life and the lives of my clients.

DAY 2: I KNOW EVERYTHING! …. Or maybe not.

DAY 2: I KNOW EVERYTHING! …. Or maybe not.

Working as a Support Worker is very rewarding. What makes the job rewarding is how challenging it is to be an effective support worker. From my own personal experience, it hasn't been an easy job. I came into this work with the belief that I knew everything and this job has proven me wrong. It has helped me to identify the weaknesses that do exist within me that need to be strengthened. This is why it is so rewarding. Oh yeah, when I said it was rewarding, I don't mean the money, I meant the skills it requires, what you learn about yourself, the pressure you're under, the mistakes you make, the solution you have to come up with to assist/support you to be effective, the way it throws you into situations/events that you have never been in, the openness of the clients, the trickery of the clients, the games they will play, the words you have to live, the  moments of fun you get to experience learning about how someone else works, the experience you create for someone who may not have everything an abled body person may have and the reward at the end of the day is the knowledge about yourself and someone else to better perfect yourself to assist/support you to become the utmost in your job that you can possibly be. That is the rewarding part about being a Support Worker.

This job has helped me to realise that I do not know everything. That I still have a lot to learn, that I am no expert, that each day will teach me something different and new about myself and the client and at the end of the day… no one really knows everything. It is all down to the moments we have, what we learn and what we do with that knowledge/information at the end of the day. Let it go to waste… or write it out and use it to correct oneself into being/becoming an effective support worker.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I know everything 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to waste all the knowledge/information that I've learned in one full day about myself and client

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to write out what I learn about myself and another client at the end of the day to assist/support myself to become effective.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let information/knowledge go to waste

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that writing out all the knowledge/information will help me become effective at my job because I'll be able to stabilize it, work with it and build upon it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that writing is a beneficial way to stabilize what I've learned about myself and the client.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that writing case notes, what I've learned about myself and client, will assist/support me to build who I can be with my clients and to help with the rapport to access parts of my client that would not likely be accessed without moments of building rapport

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand the potential can be lived out if I am using all the tools and trusting myself with in my job.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be slack in my job as a support worker.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the excuse ''But I've got it harder than all the other support workers'' to what holds me back from being the best I can be.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the excuse ''But I don't have car'' to exist within and as me.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that effective planning is part of being an effective support workers/human being.

When and as I see myself believing that I know everything - I stop and I breathe - I realise that not all situations/events, people, clients, support workers, or circumstances are the same. Everything is different, nothing ever remains the same, every moment is different and in each moment I will being learning something new, all I can do is trust myself in each moment, and make sure that I am working with knowledge/information that I have learned in training, from others, from past moments, and use it in a best for all way to assist/support me as a support worker.

When and as I see myself making excuses to not do what I know will help me to be an effective support worker - I stop and I breathe - I realise that the way to make my job the best it can be for myself and the clients is to make sure that how I've created myself is to the best of my ability and so effective in my work performance.

I commit myself to write out knowledge/information that I learn about myself and my clients at the end of the day to assist/support in keeping up-to-date on what is happening for my clients and what needs changing about myself.

I commit myself to educate myself to become an effective support worker. 

DAY 1: Double-Check EVERYTHING...!

DAY 1: Double-Check EVERYTHING...!

Part of a Support Worker's job is to do the documentation. The documentation helps to manage the client's needs. It helps to record the medication, amount of medication given, personal spending money, grocery money, keep tabs on the health of the client, to help staff keep in contact with one another by writing case notes and to show proof in case of any legal matters.

One part of the Support Worker's job is to do a handover with the next worker that is coming on shift. Depending on the company, the worker coming onto the shift has to double check everything to make sure all the information written down by the last staff member was is correct. The double checking helps to make sure that the last worker has done the documentation correctly and to correct any mistakes so that they're not held responsible for them.

One thing that I have been doing as a three-week-old Support Worker is not double checking more thoroughly. I've been told several times to check for mistakes from other workers, count the money and that is even if you think the other support workers are trustworthy. On handover, it is very important to document and double check regardless of how trustworthy or good you think the other worker is. It is a best for all approach to make sure that double checking of documentation is being done by all support workers on handover.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed look at paperwork to be a boring job

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that it is important to double check the notes, medication, information on the client and the money at handover to make sure no one has made mistakes that I could be responsible for if I do not double check.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that documentation is unnecessary

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand the importance of double check when a new staff member is coming on or off shift.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that it is beneficial for the company, staff and the client to double check that there has been no mistakes made my other staff.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that being a support worker isn't all about having fun

I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that handover, double-checking and ensuring that there is no mistakes made is all part of being an effective support worker.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that documentation is just as important as entertaining myself and the client.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that no matter how much I trust the other support workers, it is important to double check for any mistakes at handover and during my own documentation.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that documentation is a part of the process

I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realise/understand that it is important for the client's health, staff and to avoid legal matters, that all mistakes be double check and corrected if needed on the job.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want/desire to rush double-checking the documentation so that I do not keep the other staff waiting

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to say to the other staff that ''I trust you'' and not double check their work to see if there are any mistakes made.

When and as I see myself not wanting to double-check more thoroughly - I stop and I breathe - I realise that it is beneficial for the company, staff and the client if I check the documentation at handover more thoroughly incase of mistakes that, if not corrected, I could be responsible for.

I commit myself to double-check more thoroughly when I am doing handover

I commit myself to take my time when I am doing handover

I commit myself to arrive a little earlier so that I can take my time to double-check more thoroughly at handover.